6am: caleb and i will usually go back to sleep side by side after the morning feed but this morning he didn't go back to zzz... he stay awake and watch me as i prep to work, maybe he sense the difference this morning.

7.30am: loaded caleb and stuff in the car and going to my mum's place. he held my finger tight as he fell asleep in the car... i was missing him already...

8am: caleb left w my mum and gab sent me to work. i kept my mind off caleb so that the tears will stop. i told myself to kept every min occupied so that 5.30pm will come faster...

10am (now):finish clearing my emails and is waiting for things to do, fighting to not think of caleb and i think penning down my feelings here may help. better not tear in case my collegues see.